condolences to Nadia over the loss of her son
Patrick who was killed
on June 22, 2004 while serving his country
in Iraq. Visit
Nadia is a Coordinator for GoldStarsSpeak which
is a Peaceful Pro-People Organization that works
Gold Star Mothers
(Mothers who have lost a Son in the Iraq War)
They are working actively to bring our troops
home and to stop the war.
is a perfect example of how an NDE can dramatically
change a person's life. After being bitten by
a snake when she was a child, she had a very
beautiful NDE. Having to return to life from
her NDE was a tremendous disappointment to her.
Her desire to once again be in the spirit world
of love and peace caused her to attempt suicide
on two occasions. These attempts only resulted
in two more NDEs. Her final attempt and resulting
NDE eventually led to a dramatically changed
life. In fact, it resulted decades of service
to the dying and promotion of near-death experiences.
Her NDEs are profiled
excellent books entitled
Children of the New
The New Children and
We Live Forever: The
Real Truth About Death.
Nadia is the president and founder of the
and formerly headed the Bay Area Chapter of
Compassion in Action,
an organization that trains hospice volunteers.
She is the facilitator for the San Francisco-Bay
and directs her own organization,
Changing the Face
a not for profit organization dedicated to public
awareness, consciousness and service towards
|My Near-Death Experiences
by Nadia McCaffrey
It is July 7th, 1952
and I am seven years old. I am a lonely child
with a lot of questions and an immense desire
for learning. Every year I spend my vacation
from the convent school with my mother's parents
at Le Prieure de Beauvezet, their estate in
the Province d'Auvergne in France.
The main building
of Le Prieure is at least four centuries old.
It was first a chapel and later became a monastery
with its surrounding cemetery. Some of the old
walls are 1.5 meters thick. Over the centuries,
the monastery became a large, elegant house
encircled by an interesting park of lilacs,
rare plants and trees.
The master house,
now occupied by my grandparents, is located
on the very top of a hill built by human labor.
Here was once a "tour de guet" - a
tower designed to provide a view of anyone or
anything coming from far away. There is still
an underground passage which was once a means
of escape in case of an invasion.
At the foot of this
steep hillside is a grove of wild cherry trees.
Next to it is a dry stone retaining wall built
with the stones once used for the watchtower.
This is where I am standing, just at the edge
of the wall. I have been playing in the meadow,
picking flowers here and there. I simply love
flowers, especially the wild sweet peas that
are growing in colorful profusion among the
tall golden stalks of wheat. I am looking out
into the wheat field, seeing the bright spots
of color - red coquelicot, blue bachelor's buttons
and the sweet peas which seem to beckon me into
by the wheat, which seems to tower over my head,
I am debating whether I can get to the flowers.
Of course I can! I can't resist. I run into
the field, into the tall, thick grasses. Suddenly,
I stop. I have disturbed a red aspic or asp
viper - a deadly snake once used by Cleopatra
to exit this dimension. It stays perfectly still
for a long moment, then curls on its tail in
a perfect circle. Its upper body stands straight
up and its two piercing eyes stare deep into
my soul. I am petrified! I want to scream but
I can't move. A horrible pain suddenly floods
my senses and as the snake undulates away very
fast, two tiny spots of blood appear on my left
ankle. I start screaming long, piercing and
extremely loud sounds of death.
Fear is not present
but only the recognition of the fact that I
know. I just know that death is near. I try
walking up the steep hillside, but my steps
became so difficult... and then impossible.
I drop down upon the grass. At this moment,
my grandmother comes running down the hill.
Not wanting to frighten her, I say, "Un
serpent m'a mordu." (A snake bit me...)
But she knew.
She sat next to me,
took off her long black apron and with her two
hands made long narrow rags. With one hand at
each leg she began twisting them into tourniquets.
She then circled my upper leg with the twisted
cloth and made a knot. She then grabbed a stick
lying nearby on the ground. She used the stick
to twist the cloth tightly around my leg, slowing
the flow of blood to the heart. After making
the tourniquet, she removed my sandal, raised
my left ankle to her mouth and began sucking
out the venom. By this time I was drifting in
and out of consciousness.
Having done what she
could, my grandmother picked me up, carried
me to the house and gently laid me on a chaise
lounge after which I began vomiting without
In 1952 my grandparents
did not have a telephone or a car so at the
sound of my horrible screams, my grandfather
Leon had left the house on his bike. He rode
like the wind to a public telephone at the other
end of the village, more than two kilometers
from the house.
Overcome by the poison,
I slipped into an unconsciousness state. When
I regained consciousness for a short time, I
found myself in my grandfather's bed and the
bedroom was dark.
I could see the two
doctors attending me who had come as a result
of grandfather's urgent pleas. On doctor, Dr.
Nenon, insisted on giving me an injection of
vaccine Pasteur, while the second and older
doctor (Dr. Fayolle) felt that it wouldn't do
After a long argument,
the younger doctor prevailed and they gave me
the injection. As one held me down, I felt the
sting of the needle in the lower right side
of my abdomen just below my belly button after
which I slipped into a coma that lasted for
While in the coma,
I was oblivious to the real around me, but I
was oddly award that I had left this dimension.
It was then that I saw a beautiful being of
light: the Lady of Light, hovering above in
the room, who introduced herself to me as:
"Je suis ta
petite Maman du ciel."
"I am your
little mother of the sky."
was so beautiful. I still see her so clearly,
as though she was standing in mid air, glowing
with an extremely bright and powerful light.
A wondrous light that filled me with loving
and warm sense of serenity. Mere words fail
me when I try to describe the feeling of well
being and love I felt in the presence of her
light. Somehow "I Knew it all," the universal
mind of creation, the infinity of it all, I
was part of it, I am part of it. The Love that
the Lady of Light give me is so powerful and
peaceful that it must be passed on to others.
Some how I understand that this Love is what
will save us, we must care for one-another and
spread compassion in our world of sadness and
Leaving my body in
my bed, I began floating in her direction. She
then smiled very softly and opened her arms.
She held up the palms of her hands helping me
to understand that I should not come towards
her. I could see that she wanted me to listen
to what she had to say.
forte aimons nous les uns les autres.
Cet amour que j'ai pour toi seme le
a la ronde. Il y a beaucoup de facon
d'aimer. N'ai jamais peur tu seras guidee.
Je serai toujours avec toi. Tu ne peux
rester pres de moi maintenant. Tu devras
montrer le chemin. Tu vas etre l'espoir.
Au milieu d'un jardin tu verras une
rose plus rouge et plus belle que toutes
les autres. Lorsque le temps sera venu
tu feras connaitre mon message. Me parler
est prier. Prier est aimer."
"Be strong and let's all love one another.
Please share this love I have for you
with others. There are many ways to
love. Do not fear, as you will be guided.
I will be with you always. You cannot
stay with me now. You will show the
way. You will be hope. In the middle
of a garden you will see a rose, more
colorful and beautiful than all the
others. When the time will come, you
will open yourself to others and share
this message of love. To speak to me
is prayer and to pray is to love."
Before returning to
my body, I remember looking upon gray, sickly
state and feeling no pain or discomfort.
Later, while still
in the coma she again visited me and just as
before I left my body to join and she held out
her hand and again repeated the same exact message
as before but with one additional thought:
faut maintenant nous separer et toi
revenir a la vie. Tu as beaucoup a apprendre
et beaucoup a accomplir. Mon amour sera
toujours avec toi, n'oublie jamais."
"And you will now return to life. You
have a lot to learn, and a lot to accomplish.
My love will always be with you. Never
Looking back one last
time, I saw a long white gown with a cord knotted
around her waist. Her head and shoulders were
draped in blue material. There was a live green
snake at her feet and a tear shaped drop of
blood on her right foot. Both her arms were
extended toward me with her palms up and her
head was slightly bowed to the side. Slowly
both her arms came to rest on her chest crossing
I wanted so very much
to curl up in her arms, to remain with her rather
than returning to my body, but I had no choice!
My body claimed me and was immediately overwhelmed
by pain and sadness.
I was unable to completely
understand what had happened to me and had to
stay in bed for several weeks. My leg had swollen
to three times its normal size, which frightened
me because it was the same mottled color as
the snake that had bit me. Consequently, I refused
to talk with anyone. I hated being back in this
dimension and I was filled with resentment and
longing to slip out of my painful and disfigured
Later that year, after
my recovery, I learned that an adult will survive
only twenty minutes after being bitten by the
asp and that I had stayed over two hours without
My grandmother was
a healer and applied several natural remedies
and herbs on my leg, which helped. After the
swelling went down and I could finally stand
up again, and it was a great victory. People
said it was a miracle that I had survived.
I finally learned
how to walk with a cane, but my body took months
to recover. However, my spirit did not heal
Once I had fully recovered,
the Institute Pasteur of Paris sent a crew of
herpetologists to investigate the incident.
Asps were known to be in the south of France,
but not in the center where I had been bitten.
I asked if I could accompany them and watched
as they captured some of the snakes.
They used a forked
stick with a wire noose, which they slipped
over the head of the snake and pulled tight
to prevent its escape. Holding the asp tightly
behind its head with two fingers, the men forced
open its jaw and the two deadly hooks let forth
a stream of creamy venom into a glass container.
Over thirty snakes
were captured, put into bags and taken to a
laboratory for further study. One huge serpent
was found a few steps away from the house in
an ancient rosebush. He was the last one captured
and brought the total to thirty-one snakes.
After some time passed
I started asking Therese for some explanation
about the beautiful Lady of Light. I desperately
needed some information about my experience.
She seemed startled
by my account, and was filled with fear and
horror by what I had told her. She cautioned
me, "people would not understand. They
would put you away forever if you tell anyone
about this." From that day on, she thought
that I was possessed and never let me forget
it until the day she died.
It is now 1960 and
I am 15 years old. People think that I am beautiful
and bright, but what they do not know is that
I do not want to be alive.
Although I was very
popular, I pushed people away from me and felt
that my experience made me different and isolated
me from other people. I was not able to share
the way I felt with anyone and ended up hurting
people as I rejected their offers of friendship.
After seeing the Lady
of Light, being back was anything but easy.
I was all right at first, thinking that she
would be back. I wanted desperately to return
to the light, to her and to her total love.
In a tree in the park
there was a hollow spot where a limb had been
removed and into it I placed a statue of the
Virgin of Lourdes. It comforted me to visit
her there where I could recall her memory and
express my love by bringing her flowers. On
the wall in my grandmother's bedroom was another
picture of Mary that reminded me of her and
I talked to it, keeping hope alive, wishing
that she would speak to me or show me a sign.
My teenage years were
neither happy nor good. I was a rebel fighting
everything and everyone. The sisters at the
Catholic school I attended didn't know what
to do with me and my grandmother constantly
fought. I was also very resentful of my own
mother who I seldom saw, and was determined
not to accept any comfort or support from her.
In 1960, after this
years of unhappy anger and resentment that I
could never share my experience with an empathetic
soul, my desire to return to the light became
so powerful that I attempted suicide. My suicide
attempt was with pharmaceutical drugs. I had
found bottles of pills and syrups marked with
red skeleton warnings on the labels. They were
hidden in my great grandmother's house. These
drugs had belonged to my great-grandmother,
Marie Vauru, who had long since passed away.
Her medicine had been forgotten on the dark
top shelf of the pantry.
I swallowed the entire
contents of approximately 15 bottles and became
violently ill. I vomited and lost consciousness.
One of my family members found me and took me
to a local hospital where the doctors pumped
my stomach. After recovering from the physical
effects, I was returned under the supervision
of a psychiatrist.
A few months later,
I discovered that several bottles of my great
grandmother's pills still remained. Apparently,
no one in my family had thought to remove them.
As the saying goes, "if
at first you do not succeed, try again"
and that is exactly what I did. However, I took
a more sophisticated approach and methodically
calculated the dosage necessary to end my life.
Oddly enough, a girlfriend,
Antoinette, from the village came to visit,
hoping to borrow a schoolbook. Her boyfriend
Daniel drove her to my house and waited for
her outside while she ran up to my room. When
she opened the door, she found me on top of
my bed and dressed in the most beautiful ball
gown. I showed no signs of life, but I did have
a feeble pulse. Antoinette and Daniel quickly
bundled me into the car and to the Clinic Jeanne
D'Arc, a small local hospital in Vichy.
From the moment I
had taken the poison until the moment I arrived
at the hospital was approximately two hours.
Orderlies had just
wheeled me into the emergency room when once
more; I was out of my body. I floated there
for awhile, and looked down at lifeless body
on the gurney. However, the real me had become
a comfortable glowing shape.
For a while, I watched
on as the nurses and doctors worked quickly
to revive me. Then, I lost interest and my attention
turned towards a long dark tunnel. At the end
of the tunnel was a very bright light and I
floated to the opening. Once inside, I moved
with what seemed to be an extraordinary and
effortless speed, and finally reached the light.
My thoughts were dominated
by one clear thought: "Oh, the light, the
peace, the extraordinary feeling of love. Once
more I am in it." Then an extremely powerful
and loud man's voice told me to go back because
I had work to do. Then, I began going back and
there was nothing I could do to stop it.
My next moment as
a conscious realization of terrible pain and
sadness as I lay upon the gurney. One of the
nurses, an older kindly woman, was crying because
she thought that I had died (without coming
I later learned that
the doctors could not detect a pulse for approximately
ten minutes and that they had given up on me.
They were actually removing the tubes and needles
from my body when my vital signs returned. Surprised,
they quickly resumed their efforts and worked
feverishly to stabilize my condition.
In the hours that
followed, the fog of pain that dominated every
breath could not prevent my sadness. Not sadness
for what I had done, but for what I had failed
to achieve. From the outside in, I was young
beautiful intelligent woman with all the promise
of springtime. However, from the inside out,
I was a prisoner in a gilded cage made of flesh
The sense of isolation
we feel as humans is a lonely experience. Our
serenity comes to us in small pieces. Like hungry
animals we must savor each morsel with gratitude,
knowing that beyond this life we will find limitless
serenity and love. As much as I wanted that,
I was forced to realize that I had been tasked
and that I would not be allowed to shirk from
my responsibility. My choice was simple. I could
live a twisted life full of bitterness, or I
could accept my responsibility with an open
One might think that
such a decision would take many years of agonizing,
yet it was as though I simply thrown a switch
and turned on a new light -- the light of my
own responsibility. Since that day, I've not
once contemplated suicide again.
This experience changed
my life completely. Once I understood that I
couldn't go back, I stopped fighting with the
world and began trying to pass on the love that
I received to those around me.
In my work with the
terminally ill, I draw upon my own experiences
for the benefit of those who are making their
transition to another dimension. Having lost
my own fear of death long ago, I know with every
fiber of my being that love can never fail us.
It is this certainty that I can pass along to
people who are dying and to those that are troubled
and in turmoil. -
Children of the Fifth World: A Guide
to the Coming Changes in Human Consciousness
by P.M.H. Atwater
events and cultural shifts with
creation myths, evolutionary calendars,
and historical records from every
culture as well as predictions by
Teilhard de Chardin, Sri Aurobindo,
Edgar Cayce, and other visionary
seers, Atwater shows how the genetic
shift now occurring follows the
"Rule of Thirds" in its progression.
Exploring timelines for the next
several hundred years, she explains
that the coming new world will be
tailored specifically for the new
kids, who will lead the way in the
Great Shift from old world to new.
Also Available In
KINDLE EBOOK Edition.
Near-Death Experiences: The Rest
of the Story: What They Teach Us
About Living and Dying and Our True
by P.M.H. Atwater
authority on near-death states,
Dr. Atwater uses the culmination
of her research to establish that
the near-death phenomenon is not
some kind of anomaly, but is rather
part of the larger genre of transformations
of consciousness. She combines her
33 years of near-death research
with what she was doing in the 60s
and 70s, experiencing, experimenting
with, and researching altered states
of consciousness, mysticism, psychic
phenomena, and the transformational
process, to reveal what transformations
of consciousness really are, why
we have them, and where they lead
us. This lifetime endeavor covers
over 43 years of work, involving
nearly 7,000 people. Her meticulous
and unique protocol gives validity
to what she has discovered and verified.
Also Available in
The Big Book of Near Death Experiences:
The Ultimate Guide to What Happens
When We Die
by P.M.H. Atwater
An in-depth study of children
who have experienced an NDE
and the pattern of aftereffects
which follow. Atwater notes
that the child who returns from
an NDE is not the same child
as before, but is a "remodeled,
rewired, reconfigured, refined
version of the original."
Atwater shows that understanding
the NDEs of children can help
us prepare for a quantum leap
in the evolution of humanity.
Beyond the Light: What Isn't Being
Said About Near Death Experience:
from Visions of Heaven to Glimpses
by P.M.H. Atwater
P. M. H. Atwater knows what it's
like to die. And the experience
so changed her life that she has
devoted years to researching the
phenomenon of the near-death experience.
From her own encounter with life-after-death
and from interviews with hundreds
of others, she presents this remarkable
and reassuring vision into a world
beyond the one we know: What it
feels like to die; What awaits us
after we see the light; Why many
who are rescued from death don't
want to come back; Why some people
encounter hellish experiences; How
life changes after an NDE.
by P.M.H. Atwater
There are different paths to future
memory. P.M.H. Atwater says the
future memory allows people to "live"
life in advance and remember the
experience in detail when something
triggers that memory. Atwater says
the unifying, and permanent, effect
of that experience is a brain a
"brain shift" which she believes
"may be at the very core of existence
itself." In Future Memory, Atwater
shows that structural and chemical
changes are occurring in our brains,
changes indicative of higher evolutionary
development. In January of 2013,
an announcement was made of a scientific
study that verified the premise
of future memory. Unbeknownst to
the author, that scientific study
was originally inspired by an earlier
edition of her book, "Future Memory."
Also Available In Kindle Format.
Children of the New Millennium:
Children's Near-Death Experiences
and the Evolution of Humankind
by P.M.H. Atwater
Author P.M.H. Atwater presents the
first serious look at the near-death
experiences of children. Atwater
believes these millennial children
- who possess heightened sensory
and empathic abilities acquired
at birth or as a result of the near-death
experience - herald the presence
of a new race of people on Earth.
This groundbreaking book explores
how these special children will
dramatically impact the human condition
by helping humankind rediscover
the spiritual truths needed to survive
in our radically changing world.